Danielle Guerin

Archive for the ‘Your attitude is showing’ Category

As “The Barbra” would say, “People, people who need people, are the luckiest people in the world.” The truth is, we all need people. We need at least one “safe spot” where we can let it all hang out and not worry about being judged, criticized, or taken advantage of. Just by their very existence, supportive friends like these help us deal with the stress in our lives.

Since I started my business 8 years ago, I have made many true friends and I know where to turn to when, once in a while, not to often thankfully, I feel like flippin’ burgers for a big chain of restaurant instead of being an entrepreneur. I am grateful for MY Virtual Assistant community.

If you’re not lucky enough to have that kind of relationship right now, don’t worry. There are places that offer support for you from people who know your struggles and want to relish in your successes. Here are a few suggestions of where you might go to find what you need to prop you up when you need it:

Online forums

Find an online discussion forum or message board for work-at-home entrepreneurs. There are literally hundreds to choose from! While these groups often refer business to each other, their biggest benefit, in my opinion, is the support they provide. Working from home can be a lonely business, and networking with others who are in similar situations makes it less lonely. It’s impossible to feel left on your own when there are so many people on these forums to cheer you on.

A coach or mentor

Finding a coach or mentor who is several steps ahead of you on the journey to business success can be one of the best moves you ever make. Though their main goal is to provide business guidance, the good ones are also a great source of support and motivation. They know the ups and downs of the work-at-home entrepreneur, and can tell you if what you’re experiencing is just normal growing pains, or something else. Best of all, they can help you devise a plan to deal with the stress you’re feeling.

Family

Don’t overlook your family as a source of support. They may have no idea what you do all day – particularly if it involves internet marketing – but they love you and want the best for you. If you tell your spouse or loved one you just need a non-judgmental ear to hear you work through some issues out loud, you’ll likely find that he or she is more than willing to listen. Give your family a chance to learn as you learn. You didn’t know what to expect when you started down this venture, and neither did they. Include them in your learning curve. Then you’ll have a family that feels a part of your process and will be more than willing to support you.

Real face-to-face friends

When you work from home, you can get locked to your desk and find that most of your closest friends live inside your computer! That’s just fine, as these relationships are fulfilling, supportive, and “real” all on their own. But there’s also something to be said for meeting a friend for a cup of coffee and some real live conversation. We need interpersonal interaction of the face-to-face kind, with the give-and-take conversation patterns that we humans are familiar with. The start-and-stop, ebb-and-flow, of our thoughts and opinions in a real live conversation. Don’t limit your contact with the world to Facebook, Twitter, and email. Connect with your “real-world” friends regularly.

A therapist or counselor

Trained mental health professionals are wonderful resources for objective, sound advice in dealing with stress. While they probably won’t be able to help you figure out the product launch strategy for your latest interactive course, they can help you find ways to deal with relationships, stress, and other negative mental emotions. Often, when voiced out loud to a trained professional as an outside party, a thought that’s been stressing you will all of a sudden make sense. Get a good recommendation from a friend, colleague, or your doctor and schedule an appointment if you feel that a professional therapist would help you straighten out those kinks that keep you from feeling healthy and fulfilled.

Quick – pull out a few of your old To-Do lists. Look through them for that one item that keeps appearing, over and over, as you transfer it from list to list. How old is it? A week? A month? Longer?

We all have these stinkers that sink to the bottom of every To-Do list. Maybe it’s cold-calling a dozen potential partners. Maybe it’s revamping your website. Maybe it’s something as easy as making an appointment for an evaluation. Whatever your personal roadblock is, it’s time to bring it into the light of day and get it done. Here’s how:

Ask yourself why you haven’t done it yet.
Do you just not want to? Do you not know how to do it? Is it too complex to tackle all at once? Do you tell yourself it will take too long? Do you need more information before you can get started? Figure out what the hold-up is. Once you know what’s causing your stopping point, you can work to address it.

Chunk it down.
If the task is a complex one and you’re putting it off just because you think it’ll take too long, you need to break it up into parts. Of course you’re never going to get around to reorganizing your office if you’re waiting for a block of 8 empty hours when you can tackle the chore. Instead, look for smaller pockets of time where you can accomplish more manageable pieces of the larger task. If the task is particularly odious or unappealing, 15 minutes is a good start.

Give yourself a visual reminder of your progress.
If you’re dealing with a complex project that will require multiple tasks across many days, chart your progress where you can see it and be motivated by your completion (or lack thereof). Imagine a workout chart or a fund-raising goal to visualize how this would work.

Write it in your calendar.
If putting the activity on your To-Do list isn’t doing the trick, put it on your calendar. Actually schedule a specific time that you will complete the task. Don’t let anything else supersede your appointment!

Reward yourself.
Sometimes it’s enough of a reward to think past the task and imagine how your life or business will improve as a result of completing the unappealing item. But sometimes you need a little more motivation. If you’re working on reorganizing your office, promise yourself a new desk set or planner. Dinner out at a special restaurant, or $20 to spend on Amazon are also good motivators.

It’s been said that the only difference between a winner and a loser is that the winner does the things the loser wasn’t willing to do. Turn your business into a winner by tackling those tasks you’d rather avoid. You’ll usually find that getting them off your list will give you a huge boost of energy, leaving you ready to get on with the rest of your day with excitement.

Setting your priorities and sticking to them is a great step towards reducing your stress, but it won’t help much if you don’t have time to finish all the other menial tasks that are involved in running an at-home business. Items like billing, filing, ordering ink for your printer, and a million other little things that pile up over time still need to be done.

Let’s look at five methods to help you keep better track of where your time goes, and keep on top of your schedule:

Write everything down.

Famous productivity expert David Allen, author of Get It Done, recommend getting your to-dos out of your brain and onto paper. I can attest that this method works! When I’m feeling overwhelmed, I have found one of the greatest ways to de-stress is to sit down and write out everything I have to do that’s got my head spinning. Whether those are big projects, little five-minute tasks, or anything, it all goes down on paper as my brain is churning out the words. When I can actually see my thoughts on paper, I can start sorting and prioritizing (see Section 2 above).

Keep track of how long a task takes you.

It’s a common psychological trick we play on ourselves – we overestimate how long it takes to complete unpleasant tasks, and we underestimate how long we spend on pleasant items. Get real by writing down the actual time it takes you to do things like file papers, log receipts, and any other tedious task. Then you have a concrete estimate the next time you think, “Oh, that’s going to take all day!”

Minimize interruptions.

Turn off your email alert noise, put your phone ringer on mute, and clear your desktop before you jump into a task that requires concentration. Fewer interruptions and distractions allow you to get in that concentrating “sweet spot” where you’re humming along and working at a pleasant clip. That means you’ll get your work done faster and be less stressed. Constant interruptions ultimately result in needing to re-prioritize your day, over and over and over again. You can see how the stress you feel just keeps escalating without minimizing the interruptions each day.

Break down large projects.

Big projects – website overhauls, writing reports, planning marketing campaigns, creating a newsletter – can be overwhelming. When faced with a large project, break it up into tasks you can complete in one sitting, preferably in under 20 minutes. That way, instead of looking for a free afternoon to tackle the project all at once (which you’ll never get!), you just need to squeeze in 20 minutes here and there until the project is completed. I don’t know anyone who can’t find 20 minutes, but ask an entrepreneur to block out 8 hours for a project, and you’ll receive in turn a stunned glare.

Take advantage of “lost” time.

Our days are full of five minute breaks between activities. We call these “dead” time. You may be sitting in car-line at your child’s school, or in line at the pharmacy, or even waiting for a pot of water to boil. There you are, simply waiting for something to happen. Keep a notebook with a running list of tasks that can be completed in 5 minutes or less. Schedule an appointment, call a friend to set up a lunch date, clean out your voice mail, file your nails – anything that you know you need to do but don’t get around to doing.

Now when you have “dead” time, glance down at your notebook with the list of 5 minute tasks and start at the top. Work your way down the list every time you find yourself with a few free minutes. You’ll be amazed at how much you accomplish when you’re ready to go!

The power of time management can have you thinking you can do it all now! You are Superwoman! You are Superman! But, before you go leaping those tall buildings, stop and take a deep breath. There are still things beyond our control. Yes, we can do a lot, but we can’t do it all. Life sometimes gets in the way, even of the most on-task entrepreneur.  In my next post, we’ll take a look now at how to recover from situations beyond our control.